Cultivating Gratitude

Expectations...

If you don't clearly communicate what they are (and add some practice role-playing in for the littles) disaster and disappointment can ensue...

I've had to chase down a certain 3 year old more times than I care to admit because I didn't clearly communicate before hand proper etiquette at the park.

So I've made a regular practice of RELATING expectations and REHEARSING proper behavior before we go anywhere!

Relate, Rehearse, repeat

This Christmas provided yet another opportunity to do just that.  We wanted to work with our boys on gratitude when it came to receiving gifts.  So on Christmas morning, before any gifts were opened we huddled close and I laid out the game plan:

We would open gifts, one at a time.  Afterwards they were to seek out the person who gave them the gift, look them in the eye (because they are famous for shouting a thanks, but not making eye contact) and thank them specifically for the gift.  "Thank you for _______.  I'm so excited to do ____ with it!"  As a physical expression of their thanks, a big bear hug was in order.

Since we have been making a habit of pausing and thanking God for his many gifts to us, we explained that this is a natural extension to pause and thank the person who gave us a gift...

Throughout all of the 'training' I've found it also important to season everything I do with regular reminders to the boys on 'WHY' we are doing what we are doing.  Jesus outlined the two greatest commandments when He said:

“Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.

This is the first and greatest commandment. 

And the second is like it: Love your neighbor as yourself.”

Matthew 22:37-39

It is important for them to understand that everything we do is an act of worship and and opportunity to bring glory to God.  Additionally, these are opportunities to show love and respect for others.

And I have to say, I think the fruit of our little training session that morning was one of the biggest highlights of my day!  They were so adorable at our home as they put this into practice.  The excitement and gratitude were contagious.  Brothers giving each other bear hugs and getting held tight myself with beautiful eyes looking deep into mine made for a memorable morning.

Of course, they needed frequent reminders once we joined up with extended family and the distractions exponentially increased.  But overall it was so exciting to see so much growth!

We've been busy over here - trying to pull myself back into gear and still faithfully teaching and training my wonderful boys in addition to caring for the baby.  I'm in overhaul mode intentional training has been taking a growing role in our home that had grown lax in the first weeks after the baby.  So I've been taking the principles of RELATE and REHEARSE into many aspects of our lives...

Putting toys away, tidying up their room, going to the library, learning to listen for my voice and respond, and most recently in preparing for our upcoming trip to Disney World.  In fact, just today we rehearsed proper etiquette for visiting the doctor which made for a smooth trip taking my sweet little Greta in today.

And throughout all of this, I repeat my oft repeated mommy mantra...

training takes time, training takes time, training takes time.

I'm so thankful for the precious rewards that pop up in the process!

Where have you found it helpful to prepare and train your children?

Merry Christmas

So very grateful... 

for a precious baby gift! Favorite blessing of 2011!

Dad back in Arizona and CANCER-FREE! 

gifts carefully wrapped for mom by an eager and generous 5 year old.

discovering his excellent taste in jewelry. 

{he couldn't afford any, so he raided my jewelry box for gifts...}

excited boys after opening up a fieldgoal post from Mima and Pa!

the sight of my hubby holding our daughter.

 tipi handmade with love from my sister!

a mom who brought back a sister and her family to celebrate Christmas with us!

cousins excitedly watching each other open gifts.

the return of a childhood tradition: treasure hunt for a gift.

watching oldest son's excitement at the discovery!

boys with pop-guns!

boys showing their young cousin how it works!

talking, cooking, talking, cooking!

brothers-in-law enjoying their reunion and playing endless games of Dominion.

having my brother-in-laws brother join us for Christmas Day since he had to be away from his family for military training. 

Feeling blessed. 

#888-903

Counting my way to 1,000 gifts. bit.by.bit

even if it isn't Monday...

My Christmas Dress

Out here in the wild west, few people dress up for Christmas anymore it seems...  But I succeeded in convincing my family to dress up once again.  (Although the large number of jeans at the Christmas Eve service this year probably did me in for making this happen next year.)   For now, I'm relishing in the boys who will still wear matching clothes and now dressing my little girl up!

One of the beautiful things about having a daughter, especially one who was born close to when you were, is getting to dress her in outfits that you wore as a girl...

My great-grandmother made this tiny red velvet dress for me on my first Christmas and Greta got to wear it for hers!

I loved it so much that I put her in it every chance I had, including going down to Tucson to see my cousin get her PhD!  I still smile when I think of that lovely overnighter we took.  Greta and I had so much fun sharing a hotel room.  We made lots of faces in the mirror and I had the rare opportunity to give her my undivided attention for a while!

And of course, Oma snagged her every moment she could.  I can only imagine the memories this dress brought back to her!

  

Nature's Gift...

When nature hands us the gift of opportunity, we take advantage and go exploring.  Yesterday, we pulled out the balls and had an impromptu lesson on lunar eclipses.

 

Natural learning opportunities abound everywhere.  With the help of the internet and a few balls, we were able to prepare for our 'quasi' early rise the next morning.

 

With hubby tucked warmly in bed and keeping Greta company, the boys and I ventured outdoors early this morning to take in what we could of the eclipse.

Memories Made, Memories Remembered

I just love this time of year.  For our family it is actually not a very busy time and I love the quiet evenings spent making memories.  I am drinking in the moment and imprinting it in my mind - their giggles of delight, squeals as they discover a favorite ornament, excited faces as past memories are shared, time spent in awe of the Incarnation - God come to earth, etc...

I thank God for this little family He has blessed me with and I am so thankful that He sent Jesus to make a way to bring us back into His family!

Christmas lights, in every format, are a favorite at our home.

Finally, after 10.5 years of marriage, I decided that we needed a tree-topper last year.  Sadly, I didn't get it made until after Christmas.  So this is our doily star's inaugural trip to the top of the tree!  Do you have anything hand-made on your tree?

Of course, the boys favorite ornament is this little guy...

 

 I think mine is still this set that we received as a wedding gift!  Rich threatens me with a handlebar mustache every time he sees it.

While Greta was present during all of this, I'm not sure she was taking in very much.

Nursing Some Good Reads

I nurse, therefore I read...

Am I the only one who does a whole lot of reading in those first few months with a baby?  While I don't have nearly the time that I did with my first baby, I still find myself reading a lot when I am nursing my babies.  I have tendencies to get easily distracted and am usually in the middle of a couple of books.  The sleep deprivation or fluctuating hormones must be accenting that because I'm dabbling in more than usual.

I'm always curious to see what others are reading, so I figured I would share my current reads.  Since I think I've nursed her in almost every room in the house, I thought I would share the books I have located in each spot!

The Front Room

I love the lighting in this room.  We just have sheers up on all of the windows so this room is awash with indirect sunlight!  The kids spend a lot of time in this room, so naturally, I do too!

My Backpack Bible ~ This tiny Bible with a snap closure received its nickname when I bought it in college.  It travelled back and forth to school with me daily and has been a staple in my diaper bag.  I've been keeping it handy downstairs because I can hold it with one hand making reading it while nursing possible.  It is the Bible we grabbed when we did the first day of our advent devotional and pictured here.

The Shallows: What the Internet is Doing to Our Brains
I knew I was starting my climb out of the post-partum fog when I started reading this book.  What can I say, brain research excites me as long as I'm not too sleep deprived.   This fascinating read delves into how surfing the Internet is actually changing the way we think and re-wiring our brains...  I'm sure some people are more effected than others.  A friend posted a recent CNN article about 'popcorn brain' on facebook this summer and it really challenged me.  So when I saw this book, I knew I wanted to read it.

A Family of Value
My dad found this when it was offered as a free Kindle book.  He liked it so much he bought a paper copy for each of his daughters.  I wish I had read something like this several years earlier.  It is just common-sense, old fashioned parenting.  The author is a psychologist who bought into the 'nouveau' ideology advanced by mainstream psychology until their firstborn reached the age of three.  They realized that instead of creating their dream of a the loving democracy that a dictatorship had arisen and the 3 year old was in charge.  That's when they realized that they needed to return to time-tested parenting models.  His book hinges on the concept of raising children who "were endowed with traits of character that constituted good citizenship: specifically respect for persons in positions of legitimate authority; a willingness to accept responsibility for one's own social behavior as well as assignment from authority figures; and resourcefulness, a hang-in-there, tough-it-out, try-and-try again attitude toward the many challenges of life."  So far it has been eye-opening, convicting and intensely practical.  While he is a believer this is not a specifically Christian book.

The Living Room

A Natural Guide to Postpartum Health
I'm a science junkie who is fascinated with the health aspects surrounding fertility, pregnancy and babies. I've also had a growing interest in the area of post-partum care of women and nutrition. 
This book explains how the most common postpartum complaints are actually a result of nutrient and hormonal depletion and imbalance.  I found this book fascinating. It is changing the way I want to help women. I have been having conversations with my sister and a few friends over the years about how we can best care for each other post-partum and this book was very helpful. I checked it out through inter-library loan, so unfortunately had to skim through the last several chapters because I didn't have enough time to read all of it. But with the science emphasis, I didn't always have the brainpower for this kind of reading... I'm cutting myself slack though and reminding myself that I'm going through those very hormonal changes talked about and suffering from a bit of sleep deprivation. I would love to buy this book sometime so that I can use it as a resource when my friends and sisters have children!

Cure Tooth Decay Naturally: Heal and Prevent Cavities with Nutrition
I've been researching nutrition a lot over the last year and making more adjustments with how we eat.  When I came across this book during a library search for something else, it piqued my curiosity.  It is a fascinating book and while I don't think his recommendations are very reasonable for those on a tight budget, I've found changes we can make and it has challenged how I've viewed oral health...

The Kitchen Table

The Black Stallion
We've been working our way through the Black Stallion.  One of my favorite times to read chapter books to them is at the kitchen table.  Sometimes I read while they are wrapping up lunch or during afternoon smoothies.  Other times, I give them paper and turn them loose drawing while I read.  Busy hands make for more focused minds.  Even the three year old can pay attention sometimes...  

The Nursery

Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child
She isn't sleeping in the nursery at night yet, but when I'm in this room, sleep is on my mind.  Hence I reach for this book that I've read with each of my children.  This book really taught me how to read my children's sleep cues and find a routine that worked for each of them.  It is always such a relief when I start to figure my kids out and when they reach the age of slipping into a routine.  That time is just around the corner for us!

The Master Bedroom

My regular Bible is on my nightstand.  I find I can read it at night for a bit while I nurse Greta one last time.

In the days after Greta was born and I was attempting to stay in bed, I also enjoyed rereading C.S. Lewis' Out of the Silent Planet.  His vocabulary is amazing and I felt stretched in a good kind of way.  I couldn't help but reflect on how reading really helps boost and build one's vocabulary.  This is what probably inspired me to try and increase my time spent reading books over the last 2 months.


While I've promised myself to not start anything else until I finish these, I'm always looking for new book recommendations!  I'm thinking a novel would be a nice break for my next book.  So I'd love to hear what books are being read at your home.

Rainy Day Play

As the rain pitter-pattered down, I settled into a chair on the back porch with my hands wrapped around a mug of warm soup. My precious two-month old is napping inside.  Warm fills me while the wind nips at my arms, chilling them.  I slowly breath in the lovely smells that accompany a desert rain.

Meanwhile, boys race around the yard on {stick}horseback.  First they round up cattle and drive them to the train station.  Then they are off to the races - steeple chasing and coaxing other great stunts from their {stick}horses.  This is the last week of our horses unit and they are entranced with all that they have discovered.

It is a rainy day, a lazy day and yet always, always a learning day...

To live is to learn and they are busy at this work of learning - incorporating it into every aspect of their play, tapping into that creativity that God placed inside each one of them and honing their relational skills as they navigate working together.

Rainy days have a relaxing, calming effect on all of us.  Inside, the 5 year old pulls out our Global Twister map, the continent boxes and an assortment of other toys for some impromptu geography review.

Penguins take up residence in the antarctic regions, always on alert for predators like the leopard seal and the killer whale.

A discussion arose about the Liberty Bell which relocated from its original placement in western Canada to its rightful position in New England.

And Xander spent time studying his sister.

Apparently rain doesn't have a calming effect on everyone because these moments were soon followed up with some conflict resolution training as the three year old came in and laid claim to half the toys...

Life is all a learning experience, isn't it?!?

The Blessings of Trial

Trials are never fun, but I am always amazed at the blessings tucked inside various trials.

As I mentioned a while ago, there has been some upheaval in our family.  The biggest change was finding out my dad had cancer and their subsequent relocation to California for treatment.  I guess the beauty of a new baby is that the last two months have zipped by and we are excitedly anticipating my parent's return a week from now!

Watching faith in action is a beautiful thing.  God has a way of refining us, drawing us close to Him and growing us during these trials.  Oftentimes, that supernatural work spills over into other's lives as well. 

We have been blown away at the care, concern and prayer support that people have extended to our family.  My dad recently communicated his gratitude for every one's prayers as he emailed an update to friends and family.  I found myself so encouraged by what he wrote:

I definitely have noticed the Holy Spirit’s presence. I’ve also discovered that prayer is similar to radiation treatment although much more positive. Just as radiation treatment affects the surrounding organs and tissues on its way to the intended target so prayer affects the entire person (body soul & spirit) on its way to its intended fulfillment. In my case there has been an increase in God consciousness, greater capacity in resisting those irksome sins that so easily entangle and a great deal of peace. I do covet your prayers.

Thank you for your prayers for my dad.  We are filled with gratitude at God's continued faithfulness and how He uses every situation in our lives to draw us close.

After a wonderful weekend with my parents, I find myself counting and counting and counting just a few of the many gifts showered on my family...

...and I continue my formal 'online' count towards 1,000 gifts.

867. cancer treatments that are almost done.

868. radiation machines that have stayed up and running, eliminating delays in treatment!

869. trials that cause faith to grow.

870. the Holy Spirit's work through the prayers of His people.

871. the fresh realization that God cares for the whole of us - body, soul and spirit.

872. watching the boys excitement as the Thanksgiving weekend with my parents approached.

873. buying the turkey which meant an excuse to make our way over early Thursday morning!

874. a family that has been healthy so far this fall.

875. boys taking up their clubs to play the long awaited tournament.  (usually a weekly tradition)

876. seeing my dad enjoy his time with my boys as much as they enjoyed being with him.

877. baby sisters belly starting to swell with new life!

878. birthday celebrations and Dominion playing!

879. my mom here and getting to cuddle with Greta

880. the sweet reward of smiles and coo's of delight from our 2 month old darling.

881. hand-knit sweater and bonnet worn now for three generations!

882. laughing as my mom tries to smooth away the 'concentrating' wrinkles that my daughter gets on her forhead just like I do...

883. games, games and more games!

884. a long-overdue date night!
885. hiking up 'A' mountain like we used to do before we were married.

886. parents who braved taking all four kids and the three-hour window that gave us!!!

887. a fun night of making ratatouille while watching Ratatouille for the boys.