Upheaval

Sadness and contentment. Exhaustion and ecstasy. Somehow they all coexist right now.

It has been a roller coaster ride these last two months as huge changes have taken place in my family. And the timing is just too weird to be chocked up to random chance. Providence is at work and confusion melts away into trust. God's hand is all over this and I am grateful that one day I will be able to look back and see the big picture of what He has planned…

In addition to the normal emotions that are typical of the last agonizing month of pregnancy as anticipation builds and then the exhaustion and ecstasy of those first few weeks with a new baby, big changes are afoot in my extended family.

{Dad and I at our 4th of July celebration last year}

Two months ago, my dad was diagnosed with cancer. CANCER. That is never a word you want to hear when it relates to someone you love. Thankfully, it was caught very early. But it means that my parents have relocated to California for 9 weeks while he undergoes treatment. The bittersweet news was learning that they would leave the day after my due date. Prayers began in earnest that this precious little girl of mine would come early, so that my mom would be there for the birth and both of my parents could meet their newest grandchild. God was faithful and she arrived 3 days before her due date. No matter how you slice it, cancer is a horrible disease. While his treatment is renowned for its minimal side-effects, they are still there. While nursing my newborn, my prayers are focused on praying for strength for his body during treatment and that the machines would all stay in great working condition. Every day the machines are down, means an extra day tacked on that they must remain in California. We would really like to have them home by Christmas…  Would you, dear readers, consider joining me in praying for the proton treatment to work as expected and zap the cancer in the time frame that was initially given?

As if that wasn’t enough news to rock us out of our comfort zones, my wonderful brother-in-law received a great job offer in Michigan. In this economy, we are so thankful for God’s provision for them and the circumstances surrounding the arrival of this job are pretty miraculous, but {insert slight whine} Michigan is so far away… I’ll miss our last minute lunch dates, flexibility with watching each other’s kids, inspiration to eat healthier, and so on and so on. My sisters and mom are my best friends and one of them is moving away.  Their move date = my due date.

So many changes happening all at the same time…

Bright spots: My sister stayed behind until they closed on a house so she could help take care of me. (Hurray for some post-partum care. It makes a WORLD of difference.) And to blunt the loss of one sister + fam moving, my baby sister announced that they are expecting their first baby!!!!!!!!! A little cousin for Greta!

All of these changes, plus the normal hormonal and sleep deprivation craziness that typifies life with a newborn, has meant that I haven’t been around here. Every ‘lucid’ moment I’ve had in recent weeks has been spent with last minute family time.  Evenings, my typical blogging time, have found me pretty incoherent and holding my precious daughter.  She is anti-computer (which is fine since I've been wanting to cut back on my 'screen-time') and prefers me to be walking around, playing with play dough or reading a book. 

Despite the circumstances, there is peace.  While there are tears, there is also much to be grateful for.  I simply need to remind myself of those things.  So even though it isn’t Monday, I wanted to write up a long overdue gratitude post and work my way towards finishing counting 1,000 gifts…

845. Cancer caught early.

846. Treatments that have only minimal side effects.

847. My Dad's incredible faith through the years and watching it in action now.

848. My parents coming back for the weekend and being there to see my sister off.

849. These 2.5 unexpected and amazing years with my sister and her precious family.

850. Seeing God’s unmistakable hand in everything.

851. Peace that He is at work - a healing balm for all of these painful changes.

852. The realization that, all things considering, I haven't been a total emotional wreck.

853. The joy of sharing in the excitement about new life growing.

854. Husbands who care for and cherish their wives (my sisters).

855. Last minute opportunities for the brothers-in-law to play games.

856. Time in my niece and nephew's early years to spend LOTS of time with them.

857. A sister who heroically took care of me and insisted that I rest. (pretty much what it takes to keep me off my feet)
858. A visit and help from Rich's parents.

859. A mother-in-law who took Greta when she was fussy and wide-awake at 4am so I could go back to sleep.

860. My sweet daughter to hold and cuddle.

861. Boys that are ever so gentle and protective about their baby sister.

862. A hubby who holds Greta when she is at her fussiest and I’m completely drained. He’s heroically taken the 10pm baby rocking shift.

863. Weekends when my hubby is home.

864. My sister, Ev, coming over to hold the baby so I could take an uninterrupted nap 2 days in a row!
865. Wonderful friends who have brought us yummy meals over the last couple of weeks!